Hello ~ Marhaba
My name is Sahar; my parents gave me that name because I was born just before dawn which translates in Arabic to Sahar. I have been on a fulfilling journey of harvesting my freedom and cultivating joy and happiness while navigating my dark purple world. I'm here to inspire and build aspirations. I'm here to tell a story and write a book. I'm here to invite you to my dinner table. I'm to say to you, Welcome/Marhaba.
I'm here, and that matters.
I was born a refugee in Lebanon and was influenced into getting married at 16. life has been kind to me despite all of the pain I experienced. I am grateful to be here today writing this. There was a time in my life when everything looked like dark royal purple, yet, this color is my favorite.
After many years of being told I wasn't good enough. I had the courage to take advantage of my passport and use it to escape a life that felt like it was written in stone, that I would never escape it. That's how I felt. Hopeless. Today, I feel hopeful. I feel showered with blessings. I feel full of - I should insert love- instead, I'm going to say, I feel full of cat hair.
I discovered in my late forties that I could write poems in English after writing for years in Arabic. I also earned my teaching credential in my late forties. I feel like I am living life backward after living it in a narrow-minded community. I am living the life I once dreamed of. I have no fancy house and no big-paying job. But, I still feel and know that I am living a dream where I rule over my actions and emotions. I thought I was only good in the kitchen. A skill I'm shy to admit. Perhaps, because I was told my food was tasteless for so many years that I believed it. My food is not tasteless, and I love to cook. I love to display my decorating skills to create delightful, Instagram-worthy meals.
I once felt stuck and glued to a life programmed for me. My dreams were censored, my emotions were bottled, and when they did come out, they displayed a monstrous me. I learned Shiwe Shiwe, little by little, to escape inward and focus on what matters to me. This did not happen overnight, and I'm still learning to control my moods and channel my anger and frustration. So come along, and get ready to lose yourself in my babbling of poems, recipes, synopsis, and more.